Toffees for change? Take this sandal instead

My wife, Varsha, gets peeved whenever the attendant at the cash counter offers toffees instead of change. She refuses to accept the toffee-currency and has even offered to pay them back in toffees. But Nana Patekar in the forthcoming release Tum Milo To Sahi does better, he offers a sandal.



I strongly support my wife (and Nana Patekar) in her endeavour against this illegal tender. The reasons:

- Neither the Parliament of India nor the Reserve Bank of India have designated toffees (of any denomination) as legal tender, therefore we are not legally bound to accept it and it is within our rights to reject any such form of pseudo-currency.

- The cost price of the toffee for the retailer is lesser than the MRP. Therefore, it means that everytime a shopkeeper hands us a Re 1 toffee, he stands to make a profit of around 20 paise (or whatever the margin is). Therefore it is in their interest to insist on toffees instead of change.

- For those who don't have much of a liking for toffees (or the brand of toffees that they offer) it is a lose-lose scenario.

- It is quite unlikely that the supermarket/shop would accept a payment made in toffees (or a sandal in Nana's case). If no take, then why give?

I agree that could be a genuine shortage of coins in the market, given that so many of them end up stored for years in piggy banks.

Well, here is a business idea, for anyone interested:

A virtual piggy bank. You go to a supermarket make purchases for Rs 99 and pay Rs 100 in cash. As usual, no change. But you don't have to settle for that unwanted toffee. Just take out your virtual piggy bank card and the attendant will swipe it to add the Re 1 to your virtual piggy bank account. So every time there's a shortage of change, the money gets added to your account. And one day when you have accumulated enough balance on your card you can redeem it.

If this doesn't sound very feasible, here's a simpler way out: Use your credit/debit card. But don't take that toffee (unless you want to).

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The 20 Greatest Films Ever Made in India

I'm a big sucker for lists. More so when it has something to do with India and/or cinema. So obviously I was quite excited about the results of the T20 of Indian Cinema at The 40th International Film Festival of India being held in Goa. Though I didn't quite like the title, anyway the grumbles will follow later in the post.

So here are the 20 greatest Indian films ever.

1. Meghe Dhaka Tara (1960)
Language: Bengali
Director: Ritwik Ghatak
Cast: Supriya Choudhury, Anil Chatterjee, Bijon Bhattacharya, Geeta Dey

2. Charulata (1964)
Language: Bengali
Director: Satyajit Ray
Cast: Soumitra Chatterjee, Madhabi Mukherjee, Sailen Mukherjee

3. Pather Panchali (1955)
Language: Bengali
Director: Satyajit Ray
Cast: Kanu Banerjee, Karuna Banerjee, Subir Banerjee, Uma Dasgupta, Chunibala Devi

4. Sholay (1975)
Language: Hindi
Director: Ramesh Sippy
Cast: Sanjeev Kumar, Dharmendra, Amitabh Bachchan, Jaya Bachchan, Hema Malini, Amjad Khan

5. Do Bigha Zameen (1953)
Language: Hindi
Director: Bimal Roy
Cast: Balraj Sahni, Nirupa Roy, Murad, Jagdeep, Nana Palsikar

6. Pyaasa (1957)
Language: Hindi
Director: Guru Dutt
Cast: Guru Dutt, Waheeda Rehman, Mala Sinha, Rehman

7. Bhuvan Shome (1969)
Language: Hindi
Director: Mrinal Sen
Cast: Utpal Dutt, Suhasini Mulay, Sadhu Meher, Shekhar Chatterjee

8. Garam Hawa (1973)
Language: Urdu
Director: MS Sathyu
Cast: Balraj Sahni, Dinanath Zutshi, Geeta Siddharth, Shaukat Kaifi, Farouque Shaikh, Jalal Agha

9. Mother India (1957)
Language: Hindi
Director: Mehboob Khan
Cast: Nargis, Raaj Kumar, Sunil Dutt, Rajendra Kumar

10. Ghatashraddha (1973)
Language: Kannada
Director: Girish Kasaravalli
Cast: Ajit Kumar, Meena Kuttappa, Ramaswamy Iyengar

11. Elippathayam (1973)
Language: Malayalam
Director: Adoor Gopalakrishnan
Cast: Karamana Janardanan Nair, Sharada, Jalaja, Rajam K Nair

12. Mughal-e-Azam (1960)
Language: Urdu
Director: K Asif
Cast: Prithviraj Kapoor, Dilip Kumar, Madhubala, Durga Khote

13. Nayakan (1987)
Language: Tamil
Director: Mani Ratnam
Cast: Kamal Haasan, Saranya, MV Vasudeva Rao, Janakaraj, Tinnu Anand

14. Kaagaz Ke Phool (1962)
Language: Hindi
Director: Guru Dutt
Cast: Guru Dutt, Mala Sinha

15. Apur Sansar (1959)
Language: Bengali
Director: Satyajit Ray
Cast: Soumitra Chatterjee, Sharmila Tagore

16. Sant Tukaram (1936)
Language: Marathi
Director: Damle and Fatehlal
Cast: Vishnupant Pagnis, Sri Bhagwat, Pandit Damle, Shankar Kulkarni, Kusum Bhagwat, Master Chhotu, B Nandrekar, Gauri

17. Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron (1980)
Language: Hindi
Director: Kundan Shah
Cast: Naseeruddin Shah, Ravi Baswani, Bhakti Barve, Satish Shah, Om Puri, Pankaj Kapur

18. Guide (1965)
Language: Hindi
Director: Vijay Anand
Cast: Dev Anand, Waheeda Rehman, Kishore Sahu, Leela Chitnis

19. Madhumati (1958)
Language: Hindi
Director: Bimal Roy
Cast: Dilip Kumar, Vyjayanthimala, Johnny Walker, Pran, Jayant

20. Anand (1971)
Language: Hindi
Director: Hrishikesh Mukherjee
Cast: Rajesh Khanna, Amitabh Bachchan, Sumita Sanyal, Ramesh Deo

This list emerged from the 'T20 of Indian Cinema' poll in which 20 experts from around the country - 10 young filmmakers and 10 seasoned critics and scholars - participated.

While the official website for T20 of Indian Cinema - when I tried to visit was a pain (and it's been down since yesterday) - NDTVMovies.com has "showcased the 20 top Indian films in a form of a photogallery, with text by Saibal Chatterjee.

The list on www.IFFIGoa.com website is full of errors.

Do Bigha Zameen is written as "Do Bhiga Jamin", Bhuvan Shome is "Bhuvan Shoma", Garam Hawa becomes "Garam Kawa", Ghatashraddha became "Ghataskrada", Elippathayam is "Ellipathe" and Apur Sansar is listed as "Apu Triology".

Whoever came up with the name "T20 of Indian Cinema" deserves some rotten tomatoes. The greatest Indian films is not T20, it's more like Test cricket. The name itself trivialises the affair.

Anabelle Colaco of The Times of India seemed disappointed with the likes of Chandni Bar and Lage Raho Munnabhai, not making the final cut. They might be good films, but then they aren't great films. Somewhat like the difference between good and great cricketers. Saurav Ganguly was good, Sachin Tendulkar is great.

Dhiraj Ramakrishnan (@stupendousman78) questions the choice of films, replying to my tweet about the list, he asks, "how come only bengali and hindi are well represented"?.

While I'll not go on to debate which film should have or shouldn't have made it to the list, I think Dhiraj's observation is valid. It does seem more like a Hindi/Urdu-Bengali monopoly with Tamil, Malayalam, Kannada and Marathi just filling in the quota seats.

The reason why I'll not comment on selection, is because my exposure to other Indian cinema beyond the Hindustani and the Bengali is quite limited. I watched the most regional films in my childhood thanks to Doordarshan and the regional film telecast on Sunday afternoons.

The only regional film on this list that I watched is Nayakan. Though I have the other three in my library, I need to find time (and interest) to watch them.

Now on to some trivial pursuits.

If we use this list as a barometer, the following conclusions may be drawn:

* Satyajit Ray is the best Indian film director (three of his films are on the list) followed by Bimal Roy and Guru Dutt (two each).

* Bengalis (not necessarily Bengali films) make the best filmmakers in India. Eight of the 20 films on the list have been directed by Bengalis.

* The 1950s and 1960s yielded the best films in India. 12 of the 20 films are from the two decades.

* Since the 1990s there haven't been any films of note produced in India.

Back in 2005 when people pestered me going gaga over Black, I wrote:

When Black was released there were accolades all over. I waited for some time for the rave reviews to disappear and made it to the theatre. When I exited, I didn't feel that I had just witnessed the makeover of Indian cinema. It was only a relatively well-made film with a dark and damp look. The much appreciated acting seemed a little overboard. Histrionics is not equivalent to good acting. And all films sans songs are not necessarily good. It was just another hatke movie, but without the ability to really hata de.

Now this list also gives me yet another stick to beat people who still root for Sanjay Leela Bhansali's 'masterpiece'.

Of the 20 films I recollect watching almost 16, but then much of it was as a child (thanks to my film-loving neighbours). Such lists, even if you do not entirely agree with them, are a good list of recommendations for a lazy weekend.

To some it may be blasphemy, but sometimes I feel that Satyajit Ray is a bit too overrated.

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Back and introducing DOBMW.com

It's been a crazy, busy month. First went on a short vacation home, followed by crazy work schedules and then a lot of activity on the personal front, leaving me totally exhausted at the end of the day (or the start of the morning, depending on my shift at work) with no energy left to fire up Blogger and post something.

Today, after a long while, I have a part of my Sunday to myself and while the clothes wash themselves in the washing machine, I thought of putting to rest the concerns of readers and friends who seem have the inkling that I've abandoned this blog.

The last post on this blog was a month back. And it was about Blip.tv deleting my videos, the update is that I've (thanks to Blip.tv) managed to download all the videos and now have to upload them elsehwere (this is going to take some time given the number of videos that I had posted).

Far from giving up on this blog, I have some grandoise (by my standards) plans on my mind and am slowly working towards it. That, again, will take some time.

For starters, let me introduce you to a new experimental (not that new since it is online since August) website/blog - DOBMW.com. Essentially an abbreviation for the Directory of Official Bollywood Movie Websites.

You can know more about it in the About Us and FAQs sections.

This is still in a development stage, with me doing all the work (with a little lot of help from Google search). While I intend to keep it simple, will add some elements to make the indexing and search better.

And even before a formal announcement people have started to take notice.

Coincidentally, both Cutting the Chai and DOBMW.com were featured on AOL's Asylum India Indian Blogs We Love - Debut Edition.

About DOBMW.com, they say:

Or DOBMW for short, is a blog dedicated to achieving just one goal - being the one-stop source to all the official movie websites for upcoming Bollywood releases. Though it seems the site only began archiving in August this year, we feel it's still not too late to start; considering having official websites for marketing purposes came into practice in India only recently. It's quite a useful website if you love looking up Bollywood releases, wallpapers, filmi downloads and are just too lazy to search for them on the web.

You want another reason to bookmark this blog? They don't like Himesh Reshammiya either. (They say so in their FAQs!)

And on Cutting the Chai:

Run by Soumyadip, a New Delhi-based media professional, soumyadipc.blogspot.com is a blog centered around the world of Indian advertising - the good and the bad. From print ads to video commercials, special categories dedicated to condom ads (he calls it "Rubbers of India"), Soumyadip highlights the creative talent (and sometimes the lack of it that) that exist in Indian advertising. From time to time, he posts his thoughts on other media and even gives away Indian railway announcements as ringtones.

Do send in the feedback.

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How to Bell the Online Movie Piracy Cat

When you can't beat them, join them and then beat them in their own game.

Piracy is a pain for the producers and pleasure for millions of others. Millions are spent in making a film and people watch it for free or for a price that doesn't get paid back to the filmmakers.

And the Internet is making things more complex, it just takes a few hours for millions across the world to download a film and watch it at their leisure or - if their bandwidth permits - watch it online, usually at no explicit cost.

From a film viewer point of view, piracy is a boon. He doesn't need to shell out hundreds every week to watch films that, in most cases, aren't even worth the celluloid they are shot on. So he either rents it from the neighbourhood DVDwallah or buys it from a Palika Bazar or better still, downloads it from the Internet for free. And the best part is that he can watch the film at leisure, even pausing to answer that phone call and fast forwarding those mandatory boring songs or replaying that particular hot scene/song over and over again (much like what many small town theatres did for the Chaiya Chaiya song in Dil Se).

An average movie fan is the selfish kind. The anti-piracy preachings have no impact on him. We are like this only.

While producers and distributors scratch their heads thinking of deterrants and ensuring returns, let me put forward some uninvited advice.

In the good ol' video cassette days, films would release on VHS on the same friday of their release. Then came Hum Aapke Hain Kaun and started the trend of delayed home video release. Hum Aapke Hain Kaun was the first film I saw a camera print (or cam rip as it is now known in the circle) of. Our local cablewallah had aired the film a few days after its release.

This was precisely what gave a boost to the bootleg business. When you deny a legit way of accessing stuff, there, as a rule, get carved out numerous illegit paths. My suggestion is that DVD releases should not be delayed beyond two weeks from a theatre release. Because right from the first week the pirated DVDs get rented out (and also copied). A single DVD can keep away hundreds of viewers away from the theatres. So why not release the DVD early and make some money before the pirates do?

Anyway, nowadays the most of a film theatre earnings comes from the first two weeks, an early DVD release would only mean extra earnings, as the interest in the film would still be on the higher side. With time, for most films, the interest tends to fade away and that refelects in the DVD sales figures.

And I suggest that Bollywood films be officially released online simultaneously with the theatrical release. They anyway make it to the P2P and video sharing circuit within a few days and in some cases even before that.

With the likes of YouTube expressing interest to offer online movie rentals, things will just get smoother.

Amongst Indian websites, there are the likes of Rajshri.com and BigFlix.com who are already in the game (though the films they currently show are old). NDTV Convergence's Tubaah.com could also be a potential platform.

There would obviously be costs involved for both the content provider and the consumer. Bandwidth and storage costs money and producers would obviously like to make the best out of such a deal. Such online streaming could be ad supported (no ads coming at a premium). Big corporates would be interested in sponsoring such activities, given the number of eyeballs they can potentially attract.

And there also can be an access cost for the consumer. Not something like the DVD prices of the past (until Moserbaer came along with its smart business sense), but a price that I'll be willing to pay to save me from the bother of driving all the way to the theatre to watch an average film. Something in the range of Rs 10 to Rs 50, depending on the movie. Anything higher would be an invitation to fire-up the P2P software.

Online streaming technology has got better and more secure for the content providers (though I'm no great supporter of DRM). Protocols like RTMPE are tougher to leech (and Adobe tried to limit the distribution of rtmpdump).

But in India, given the abysmal Internet speed, online viewing might not be the best option. The NRIs would be game, though. For India, the video of the film could be built into a software (multi-platform) that can be downloaded for a prefixed price, depending on the demand and freshness of the film and the quality of the video.

The software should be a portable version that doesn't require installation and would have the player and all the necessary codecs built-in. Moreover, it could self-destruct after a pre-specified time interval - 24 hours upwards - (again depending on the price paid to download it) to prevent further circulation. This can again be ad supported for extra revenue.

The video (within the application) should also be available in different qualities, to let consumers choose the file size according to their needs and download speed. There is no point giving anyone on a GPRS or EDGE connection a 1GB file. By the time it finishes downloading, it'll be timeout.

If the prices are kept attractive enough, it's a money minter. When consumers know that for a small price they can get the real stuff and not any cam-rip or PDVD-rip, many will be interested. I am.

After all many buy a pirated DVD for Rs 20-Rs 50 or rent it for Rs 10-Rs 20. It's not that people are not willing to spend money. The right price usually manages to find many buyers.

Though this deal is primarily targeted towards people who watch their movies on their computers and the film is not for keeps. Those who want the DVD could wait only just a little longer.

Even cyber cafes can be made partners in the business, as distributors for people with slow or no internet connection.

All this makes sense (to me). But the question is, who will bell the cat?

Related posts:

· Did the pirates return Anurag Kashyap a favour?
· Music for a Song
· The MP3 Wars - How Music Companies Can Emerge Victorious

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Will Kaminey Rise Above the Kabaad?

"I'm longing to watch a good film on the big screen. Hope Vishal Bhardwaj doesn't disappoint," said an exasperated Bollywood-fan friend.

Let me add a little more weight of expectations on Vishal Bhardwaj's shoulders (I've long given up hope on Ram Gopal Varma), "Me too".

2009 is almost two-thirds snuffed out, and there isn't still a single big-budget Bollywood release that was worth the while. Thanks to smaller films like Dev D, Barah Aana and Firaaq, that my 2009's worth of films wasn't completely worthless.

Besides Kaminey (and Quick Gun Murugun, ofcourse), I don't see any other movie for which I'll be munching overpriced popcorn in a dark hall.

Vishal's oeuvre is impressive, from the endearing Makdee to the dark Omkara, with Blue Umbrella and Maqbool in between, it should just get better and better (unlike RGV).

In an era where actors rule, there are very few movies that sell by the name accompanying the director's tag. Kaminey is one such film. Vishal is one such director.

I've had enough of these fake hits (read Kambakkht Ishq) and monumental flops (read Chandni Chowk to China), I now desperately need paisa wasool. No more films like Manmohan Singh's speeches - high on promise, low on impact.

I think Shahid Kapur, though he often looks a decade younger than his female leads, will make it really BIG, the SRK -ype big. And boy, can he dance! Anyway he has been doing that for many years, people have even been looking for him amongst the dancers dancing behind Aishwarya Rai in Taal. Still a long way to go, but he'll reach there. Almost all of my female friends seem to agree.

And Vishal Bhardwaj, the review of your film that I post on this blog better not have the title - 'Kaminey makes a ch*tiya out of us.'

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Quick Gun Murugun is Coming. Mind it!

The early 1990s, I was still in school and we didn't have a cable connection at home. But I managed to 'boost' the antenna to catch stray cable TV signals.

The result was grainy, but good enough for me. And it was there, on a black and white TV screen, that I first met the legendary Quick Gun Murugun.

Now over a decade later the vegetarian cowboy is finally all set to shoot his mouth off on Indian silver screens.

And the man bringing the superhero with guntastic powers back is none else than the man who first introduced the character to us, Shashanka Ghosh. He was the then creative head of Channel [V].

The film is apparantly being released in four languages; English, Hindi, Tamil and Telugu. Quick Gun Murugun is releasing on August 28, 2009. I'll book my tickets in advance.

The trailers of the Misadventures of an Indian Cowboy promise fun and Shahrukh Khan's take on Quick Gun Murugun in Om Shanti Om, would have familarised filmgoers who weren't exposed to the phenomenon.

I've put together a consolidated version of the Quick Gun Murugun trailers floating around.



And I've created a playlist a few Channel [V] Quick Gun promos here.

Shashanka's debut as a director was the sequel without a prequel (actually with an embedded prequel and sequel. Three films in one!) Waisa Bhi Hota Hai Part II. One of my all-time favourite songs, Allah Ke Bande, is from that film.

The synopsis of the film on its official website reads (Mind it! All links there open in new windows):

Quick Gun Murugun is an unlikely Superhero with Gungastic powers. He is a sincere South Indian Cowboy who considers it his duty to serve and protect. The movie revolves around the mis-adventures of Quick Gun Murugun and his fight with his arch villain Rice Plate Reddy!

Quick Gun enters into an epic battle that spans time and space. From a small South Indian village to Swarglok and then finally to the cosmopolitan Mumbai. He is torn between Mango Dolly who loves him secretly and his first love Locket Girl and his loyalty is put to the test.

And the producers have also commissioned a few comic book posters:


[Click for larger images]

The star cast includes, Dr Rajendra Prasad (Quick Gun Murugan), Nasser (Rice Plate Reddy), Rambha (Mango Dolly), Anu Menon (Locket Lover), Sandhya Mridul (Masala News Reporter), Vinay Phatak (Mr Chitragupt), Ranvir Shorey (Sansani Reporter)and Raju Sundaram (Rowdy MBA).

People who have already watched it at film festivals have good things to say about the film. Hope I too get added to the film's fan list. And you too. I say!

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The Best Bollywood Love Songs Ever

Well... not exactly. The title of the post is a bit misleading. In fact it is the best Bollywood (Hindi / Hindustani) love songs that I could recall and also find the videos of. Which makes it a compilation of convenience rather than a comprehensive one.

Anyway, befitting the mood of the day (though I never did 'celebrate' this day, but it being associated with love, I'm all for it) here are The Best Bollywood Love Songs Ever* (*conditions apply) (A list of included songs is at the end of this post).


Download video [00:14:52 FLV 24.2 MB]

The Best Bollywood Love Songs Ever

(In no particular order and with many notable omissions. Reasons mentioned above)

* Aaja Sanam Madhur Chandni Mein (Chori Chori)
* Aankhen Bhi Hoti Hai Dil Ki Zuban (Haasil)
* Abhi Na Jao Chod Kar (Hum Dono)
* Ae kaash ke hum (Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa)
* Aye Mere Humsafar (Quayamat Se Quayamat Tak)
* Aye Uri Uri Uri (Saathiya)
* Baahaon Ke Darmiyan (Khamoshi)
* Chalo Dildar Chalo (Paakezah)
* Chehra Hain Ya (Saagar)
* Chookar Mere Man Ko (Yaarana)
* Dil Ka Bhanwar Kare Pukar (Tere Ghar Ke Samne)
* Do Dil Mil Rahein Hain (Pardes)
* Dil Tadap Tadap Ke (Madhumati)
* Pyar Hua Iqrar Hua (Shree 420)
* Humein Tumse Pyar Kitna (Kudrat)
* Jo Wada Kiya Woh (Taj Mahal)
* Khoya Khoya Chaand (Kala Bazar)
* Ehsaan Tera Hoga Mujhpar (Junglee)
* Ek Ajnabee Hasina Se (Ajnebee)
* Ek Ladki Ko Dekha (1942 A Love Story)
* Hoshwalon Ko Khabar Kya (Sarfarosh)
* Pehla Pehla Pyar Hain (Hum Aapke Hain Kaun)
* Hum Hain Is Pal Yahan (Kisna)
* Jiya O (Jab Pyar Kisi Se Hota Hain)
* Karvate Badalte Rahen (Aap Ki Kasam)
* Khwaab Ho Tum Ya (Teen Deviyan)
* Lag Jaa Gale (Woh Kaun Thi)
* Mein Shayar To Nahin (Bobby)
* Mein Yahan Hoon Yahan (Veer-Zara)
* Mein Koi Aisa Geet Gaaun (Yes Boss)
* Mere Sapno Ki Rani (Aradhana)
* O Re Chori (Lagaan)
* Phoolon Ke Rang Se (Prem Pujari)
* Raat Akeli Hain (Dev Anand)
* Suraj Hua Madhyam (Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gum)
* Tere Mere Milan Ki Yeh Raina (Abhimaan)
* Tere Mere Sapne (Guide)
* Tere Mere Beech Mein (Ek Duje Ke Liye)
* Tujhe Dekha To Yeh Jana Sanam (Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge)
* Tum Aa Gaye Ho (Aandhi)
* Tum Bin Jaaon Kahan (Pyar Ka Mausam)
* Tumse Milke Aisa Laga (Parinda)
* Dil Cheez Kya Hain (Umrao Jaan)
* Kabhi Neem Neem (Yuva)
* Pehla Nasha (Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikandar)
* Chura Liya Hain (Yaadon Ki Baarat)
* Jab Pyar Kiya To Darna Kya (Mughl-e-Azam)

Love, the mainstay of Indian cinema and film-music (over 95 per cent of film songs would be love-based. Maybe I'm underestimating) cannot be relegated to a list of 47 songs. What's your favourite love song (that this list missed)?

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